“The Muffin Button”

Dr. Briefs: Goku!

Goku: Hi, Dr. Briefs!

Dr. Briefs: Listen very close, Goku.

Dr. Briefs: Whatever you do, don't fool with the gravity controls. It goes up to 100 times Earth's normal gravity.

Goku: So what you're saying is: If I turn up the gravity, then I can get stronger!

Dr. Briefs: NO! What I'm saying is it will crush your bones!

Dr. Briefs: The detrimental effects could be catastrophic! You may never walk again!

Goku: Bored now. Gotta train. Bye bye!

Dr. Briefs: GOKU! WAIT!

Goku: I like his mustache.

Goku: ♫ CHA-LA HEAD-CHA-LA ♫

Goku: ♫ Egao urutora zetto de ♫ (With a smile that’s Ultra-Z)

Goku: ♫ Kyô mo ai-yai-yai-yai-yai~ ♫ (Even today is ai-yai-yai-yai-yai~)

Goku: ♫ Sparking! [fading echo] ♫

Dodoria: (Grunts)

Zarbon: Are you alright over there?

Dodoria: Yeah. Little bastards just hit me outta nowhere.

Zarbon: Oh, trust me. I know what it's like to take a hard one to the face.

Freeza: Good to see you're still conscious, Dodoria.

Freeza: Oh, and just so you know, it's not a big deal or anything, you might want to get right onto this one, but THEY'RE GETTING AWAY, YOU FAT BASTARD!

Dodoria: (Growls angrily)

Krillin: Not gonna lie, Gohan; not your brightest move.

Gohan: Oh, come on, Krillin; we have a two mile lead on him.

Gohan: Factoring in our speed and velocity and his mass, there's no way he should be able to catch up--

Dodoria: URAAH!

Krillin: Well, *look who's wrong*!

Gohan: There's always room for error!

Dodoria: URAGH!

Krillin: AAHRUGH!

Krillin: 'Aw dammitdammitdammitdammitdammitdammitdammitdammitdammit--!'

Dodoria: No, you don't!

Zarbon: How do you think Dodoria is doing up there?

Freeza: We're talking about one of my finest soldiers.

Freeza: There's no way that they'll escape Dodoria's grasp.

Krillin: D'YAGH!

Dodoria: OOGH!

Dodoria: God dammit.

Zarbon: But what if they have any tricks up their sleeves?

Freeza: Come now, Zarbon! We both know Dodoria would never let them out of sight.

Krillin: SOLAR FLARE!!!

Dodoria: God, *dammit*!

Zarbon: Still sir, we have to remember that Vegeta is on the planet.

Freeza: Oh, please! Like Vegeta could even lay a hand on Dodoria!

Dodoria: D'UGH!

Dodoria: GOD *DAMMIIIIIIIT*--!!!

Dodoria: (Gasping for air)

Vegeta: 'Sup, Bubblegum?

Dodoria: Vegeta! You got some serious balls to get the drop on me!

Vegeta: Funny you should mention that. I just happen to be looking for a set.

Dodoria: Well, look at you, Veggie. All grown up and out on your own, trying to move up in the world.

Vegeta: And look at you, packing away more bacon than Hormel.

Dodoria: Very funny. But you won't be laughing when Freeza finds your scrawny ass.

Dodoria: So how about I make you a deal:

Dodoria: You hand over that pretty red Scouter, and maybe I won't point Freeza in the right direction.

Vegeta: Oh! You mean *this* Scouter?

Dodoria: That's right.

Vegeta: Well, I'd be inclined to give it to you; but, you see, there's a problem with it.

Dodoria: And what would that be?

Vegeta: It's broken.

Dodoria: Blagh!!! You fool! Now you're as blind as the rest of us!

Vegeta: Not quite. See, while I was on Earth, I learned a new trick.

Vegeta: I can sense energy.

Dodoria: How the hell'd you do that?

Vegeta: I dunno.

Dodoria: Wait a minute...! I get it now! Those little bastards I were chasing were Earthlings!

Dodoria: You sent them to lure me away from Freeza!

Vegeta: I'm sorry, but at this point, all I hear is: "Hit me, Vegeta!" "Please kill me!" "God, this armor makes me look fat!"

Dodoria: THAT'S IT! RRRRAGH!

Dodoria: MOUTHY! LITTLE! PRICK!

Vegeta: Where you aiming, Dewgong?

Dodoria: RRGGHH!

Vegeta: Upsie daisy!

Dodoria: RRAAGH!

Dodoria: (Growling in pain)

Vegeta: Any last words before I take you apart like a pink Potato Head?

Dodoria: W-W-Wait! I can tell you what really happened to your planet!

Vegeta: You mean that Freeza blew it up?

Dodoria: NO! THATFREEZABLEWITUP!!!

Dodoria: ...What?

Vegeta: Really should have told Freeza to keep off the Twitter.

Dodoria: Ple-e-ease, do-hon't kill me, I beg ya, DON'T KILL MEE-EE-EE-ee-ee-eeeee...!

Vegeta: Look at you, Dodoria... you were always so damn proud... and now here you are, CRYING like a woman!

Dodoria: I AM A WOMAN!!!!

Vegeta: Wha--

Vegeta: ...*What*?

Dodoria: I SAID I AM A WOMAN!!

Vegeta: ...WHAT?!

Krillin: Welp! Good thing I was there to get us out of that one!

Gohan: Well, yeah, but, why didn't you use your Kienzan--?

Krillin: HEY LOOK! I even saved this thing. Can you fly, little guy?

Dende: My name is Dende. And yes; we all learn when we are children.

Gohan: You know, you should probably stick with us.

Dende: Considering it is either that, or going back to meet the same fate as my brother and father... I am weighing my options.

Krillin: I like you! I'm gonna call you Little Green!

Dende: My name is Dende.

Krillin: Come on, Little Green! Let's go introduce you to Bulma!

Dodoria: ...and that's why I was considered the most beautiful, and fertile, woman on my home planet.

Dodoria: ...Before Freeza blew it up.

Vegeta: He tends to do that. Also, huuuughhh!

Dodoria: So now you know the truth, Vegeta.

Vegeta: Yes, I do. And now I'm going to start repressing the truth!

Vegeta: And the first step... is killing you.

Dodoria: W-W-Wait!

Dodoria: You and I, w-we could team up against Freeza! Rule the universe - as husband and wife!

Vegeta: Repressing in 5... 4... 3... 2... 1...!!

Dodoria: (Panicking)

Dodoria: (Screaming)

Vegeta: ...aaaaaand repressed.

Gohan: Krillin, that's the cave!

Krillin: Hey Bulma, you clean up in there? We have guests.

Dende: I do not think I want to go in there.

Krillin: Awww, don't worry. That's just Bulma.

Dende: I do not know what this "Bulma" is, but it sounds needy.

Krillin: Hey Bulma, open up!

Bulma: Hmm?

Bulma: Well, if it isn't Mr. Super Soaker himself!

Bulma: What happened? Got tired of abandoning me and found something else to abandon?

Krillin: BULMA! You're scaring Little Green!

Dende: I am still weighing my options...

Bulma: Oh, by the way, my Dad called earlier.

Bulma: He says Goku's on his way here!

Krillin: WOOHOO!

Bulma: And he'll be here in six days.

Krillin: WOOHOO--oohhhh.....

Krillin: Well....good thing I took out that life insurance policy.

Dende: Mr. Gohan? Those things on that person's chest... what are they?

Gohan: Oh, on Bulma? Those are breasts.

Dende: They look lovely. I wish to nestle between them...

Krillin: You are just adorable!

Freeza: Oh-- no, no Ginyu, we don't need any assistance. We have this all under control.

Zarbon: Lord Freeza, I wish to enter.

Freeza: Oh pardon me, I have to take this. Ta ta!

Freeza: What is it, Zarbon?

Zarbon: Well, sir, the Scouters reported back.

Freeza: Gooooood; so Dodoria has eliminated those pests then?

Zarbon: Well... that's just it...

Zarbon: It turns out... she's dead.

Freeza: ...THE F**K?!

Goku: Now... before I start training, I need the right music to train to!

Goku: Let's see here...

Goku: YAAAY!