“Eat That Horse”

Bulma: Wait... so you're saying he had a sub-lab?

Dr. Briefs: *Of course* he had a sub-lab! We all have sub-labs; where do you think I keep your mother's clones?

Bulma: Mom's *what*?!

Dr. Briefs: Don't go in the basement.

Dr. Briefs: Oh, look! There's bombs in the androids! I could probably make a detonator for that!

Krillin: I don't know - do you really have to blow them up?

Dr. Briefs: Why do you care? They're mostly just machinery at this point.

Dr. Briefs: Oops! Except for the lady; baby-maker's still intact. Guess she's still useful for somethin'.

Krillin: So, you're saying she still has a--

Dr. Briefs: Vagina, yes.

Krillin: Just went from a nine to a ten!

Bulma: Ugh! Anyway, where's everyone else right now?

Krillin: Well, Piccolo and the others are searching for Cell...

Piccolo: How are all these rides still running?!

Tien: Why are the clothes still on them?

Piccolo: THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A PLACE OF FUN!

Krillin: ...So hopefully that's going well...

Krillin: And Trunks went out to find Vegeta.

Trunks: NOTICE ME!

Vegeta: NOOO!

Krillin: Best of luck there.

Bulma: And any update on Goku?

Krillin: Oh, he's just resting at Kame House... probably still asleep.

Chi-Chi: Uuu-uhh! Uh, huh?! AHHH! THE ANDROIDS ARE HERE!

Chi-Chi: Bring it on, you robotic sons of--

Chi-Chi: ...huh?!

Chi-Chi: Oh no! They've already got him!

Chi-Chi: AH!

Roshi: Did I miss something?

Roshi: Ehh...?

Roshi: Well, either Goku's awake or Moses has brought the Jews. Either way, my pantry's not full enough.

Chi-Chi: (Gasp!)

Roshi: Hm?

Chi-Chi: Goku!

Roshi: Eh heh!

Roshi: IEEE...!

Goku: Oh hi!

Chi-Chi: (Laughs joyfully)

Goku: Aww, hugs are nice!

Chi-Chi: Oh, tell me you're finally okay!

Goku: Yuh-huh! Never felt better! Wanna see?

Chi-Chi: Hold on--

Chi-Chi: AAAHHHH...!

Goku: Huh! Wonder when she'll come back down--

Chi-Chi: AAAHHHH--!!

♫ CHA-LA HEAD-CHA-LA ♫

♫ Egao urutora zetto de ♫

♫ Kyô mo ai-yai-yai-yai-yai ♫

♫ *Sparking!* ♫

Android 18: I can't believe you took this thing off-roading...!

Android 18: This thing *barely* handled on the *freeway*!

Android 17: Oh, come on, Eighteen! Where's your sense of adventure?

Android 18: About 15 miles back with the shocks!

Android 16: I personally enjoy this alternate route.

Android 16: It is decked with foliage and wildlife and-- ...and spending time with you. But clearly, you disagree.

Android 17: Won't lie, sis. Kind of a dick move.

Android 18: Oh, come on! We'll take him to a zoo after this.

Android 18: How's that? You wanna hit up the zoo, Sixteen?

Android 16: I want to see the parrots.

Roshi: Goku! You have missed a hell of a day!

Goku: Oh, I know everything; I learned it in my pirate dream.

Goku: I was having a ninja dream too, but it ended.

Chi-Chi: Alright, now listen: I know you just woke up, so--

Goku: Yeah, I was outta permission for a while! I really oughta get back to training...

Chi-Chi: (Growls)

Goku: ...so I can fight Cell!

Chi-Chi: (Growls louder)

Goku: What? I-if you're worried about Gohan, I'll bring him along with me!

Chi-Chi: (Sigh)... fine.

Goku: Huh?

Chi-Chi: Go ahead, go train! Take Gohan. Fight your evil android bug monster!

Chi-Chi: But I want you to promise me *one thing*...

Goku: Okaaay... what's that--

Chi-Chi: I want another baby!

Goku: Mmm, mmm...

Goku: K, BYE!

Roshi: Uhh... was that a "yes"?

Chi-Chi: It~ wasn't a "no"~!

Roshi: Mmm! Mmm!

Roshi: K, BYE!

Krillin: Thanks for swinging by to pick me up!

Yamcha: What were you doing at Bulma's house anyway?

Krillin: Oh, just droppin' off the blue-gina-- I mean vag-prints!

Krillin: I mean, thanks for swinging by to pick me up!

Piccolo: This is bad! We can't keep running after Cell. Every time he slips away, we lose another city!

Tien: Don't be so melodramatic. Worst case scenario - we wish people back with the Dragon Balls.

Piccolo: Uuh? Uhhhhh...

Krillin: Oh God, what?!

Piccolo: So, remember how Kami and I fused?

Tien: No...!

Piccolo: Aaand, remember how we used to have Dragon Balls?

Tien: Holy shit!

Krillin: Wait, I'm still confused!

Tien: The Dragon Balls don't exist anymore, Krillin.

Krillin: OH! OKAY!

Yamcha: Dude, don't worry. I still have the bunker--

Krillin: WHY DON'T WE HAVE GOKU?!

Goku: I'm taking Gohan, BYE!

Gohan: Wha--?

Piccolo: Good news! We have Goku!

Krillin: Bitchin'! Let's go hang at Kame House!

Kami: 'Oh, good! We'll have to see if he's carrying.'

Piccolo: 'Carrying what?'

Kami: 'I'm asking if he's got any grass on that island.'

Piccolo: 'Well, yeah. But it's mostly covered by that house.'

Nail: 'He's asking if he has any pot.'

Piccolo: 'I don't know, probably. I mean, he knows the Mafuba.'

Kami: 'Oh, my God...!'

Nail: 'The *what*??'

Trunks: Huh?!

Gohan: What just happened?!

Trunks: Goku... and Gohan?!

Goku: I'll fill you in later, Gohan. Hey, Trunks! How's the training coming?

Trunks: I don't know, let's see...

Trunks: Hey Dad, do you wanna train with me?

Vegeta: F*** OFF!

Trunks: About that well.

Goku: Ooh! Only on two words, huh? I'll go talk to him.

Android 17: So Eighteen, what's it look like in there?

Android 18: It looks like Goku's wife is a Chinese princess. Seriously, I'm glad she's my size, but who wears this junk?

Android 17: I mean, is Goku there?

Android 18: Oh, no; place is empty. Devoid of both people *and* taste.

Android 17: Huh! Didn't figure Goku for a runner.

Android 18: Well, if I were a guessing girl, I'd say they're at Kame House.

Android 17: But that's, like, the second place we'd look.

Android 16: Confirmed: That is the second place we shall look.

Android 17: Mmm... but it's on an island, so we can't take a van...

Android 18: Oh, thank God!

Android 17: ...So we'll find a boat!

Android 16: *No*!

Android 17: Pardon?

Android 16: We have done it your way. Now we do it my way: the bird way.

Android 16: We flyyy~!

Android 18: He's finally speaking my language. I mean... kind of...

Mr. Popo: Here it is, maggots - the Hyperbolic Time Chamber.

Goku: Waiiit... I thought it was called the "Room of Spirit and Time".

Mr. Popo: I said that because you kept mispronouncing it.

Goku: N'aww, I can do it!

Goku: Hypebola Mine Chamber.

Mr. Popo: No.

Goku: Hyperglycemic Crime Chamber.

Mr. Popo: You get one more.

Goku: ...Hypebonics Rhyme Chamber.

Mr. Popo: Hmm.

Mr. Popo: Inside, time moves at 365.24 times that of this dimension.

Mr. Popo: In Goku terms: One day out here - one year in there.

Mr. Popo: And only two of you maggots can enter at a time.

Gohan: Wait! How long have you known about this?

Goku: Since I was a kid.

Gohan: Then why didn't Krillin and the others use it to train against the Saiyans? Why didn`t WE use it to train against the Androids?!

Mr. Popo: They had... other training...

Mr. Popo: Besides, they most likely would not have survived. I threw Goku in there once when he was a kid.

Goku: I almost died.

Mr. Popo: Hmm.

Vegeta: Then the boy and I will go first and save you two the trouble.

Vegeta: Move it, boy!

Trunks: Help me...!

Goku: Have fun, Trunks! You too, best buddy!

Goku: Huh! You know, you don't really seem like yourself today, Mr. Popo.

Mr. Popo: Hmm.

Reporter: ...find a cabin in the woods, and if anyone comes knocking, make sure you let the right one in, or you'll be dead by dawn.

Krillin: Not today...!

News Anchor: The death toll keeps rising as...

Another News Anchor: ...the unknown creature continues its...

Yet Another News Anchor: ...terrifying siege across our nation!

Piccolo: I GET IT, HE'S ABSORBING PEOPLE! I'M TRYING TO STOP IT!

Kami: 'Maybe you should get some sleep like everyone else.'

Piccolo: I'LL SLEEP WHEN I'M DEAD!

Android 17: I can help with that!

Piccolo: Huh?!

Piccolo: WAKE UP!

Krillin: AHH!

Krillin: Oh man! I had the craziest dream - Cell was there.

Piccolo: Well, the Androids are *here*!

Android 17: Yo.

Krillin: AAAHH!!

Android 17: We're here for Goku.

Piccolo: Son of a bitch!

Android 16: Son Goku is not here.

Android 17: Son of a bitch!

Piccolo: You heard him: Goku's not here.

Android 17: Oh, I heard him. We're just not very happy about it. Right, 16?

Android 16: Son Goku... is not here!

Android 17: Exactly! And we came all the way out here to kill *somebody*.

Android 17: So, you've got one of two choices: You can either tell us where Goku is, or, well...

Piccolo: Or, what?

Android 18: Or we kill you! Oh, my God!

Krillin: Hey, Eighteen! You... you come around here... often?

Android 18: Nope!

Krillin: Hmm!

Roshi: Uh, excuse me Androids?

Roshi: If you're gonna fight, could you please move it off the island? It's quite literally the only thing I own.

Android 17: That's fine. But when I win, I'm blowing it up for funsies.

Roshi: Hmm!

Piccolo: Alright then, follow me. There's a series of uninhabited islands over there.

Android 17: How do you know that?

Piccolo: You three stay here. I'll handle this.

Krillin: Okay! I'll Spacebook you later!

Yamcha: So, if he fails, we're all gonna die, right?

Tien: Basically... and we have no Dragon Balls.

Yamcha: Hope training's going well...

Trunks: Holy...! This place...

Trunks: It's... nothing but a white void!

Trunks: I can't see where it ends... or even where it begins!

Trunks: It's... overwhelming! I need time... time to adjust, time to--

Vegeta: TRAINING BEGINS NOW!

Trunks: AHH!

Vegeta: You weren't ready.

Trunks: (Groans)

Dr. Briefs: Soon...

Dr. Briefs: (Chuckling)