“Crap Baskets”

Vegeta: When a goddamn Super Saiyan asks you for a Senzu Bean, bald man, you say "how many"?

Vegeta: Aah, that's better.

Vegeta: Count yourselves lucky to be in the presence of a shining golden God such as myself.

Vegeta: Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to go kill the OTHER Android.

Vegeta: You peons may stay here and erect a statue in my honor.

Krillin: Soooo...

Krillin: Vegeta's a Super Saiyan.

Tien: Yeah, whatever. Did you catch the name of his attack, though?

Piccolo: I know, right? "Big Bang Attack"?

Nail: 'Uh, I dunno, this coming from Mr. "Special Beam Cannon".'

Piccolo: 'Hey, why don't you try coming up with a better name for an attack?'

Nail: 'How about...'

Nail: '"Devil Drill Beam"?'

Piccolo: 'What about "Spiral Death Beam"?'

Nail: '"Doom-Laser"!'

Piccolo: '"Rail Beam"!'

Nail: '"Nail Gun"?'

Piccolo: ...Shit, that's good.

Vegeta: 'So just because he's a machine, I can't feel his energy?'

Vegeta: 'That doesn't make any sense!'

Vegeta: 'Energy sensing's bullshit.'

Vegeta: Hey, why you hidin'?! You scared 'cause I blew up your friend?!

Vegeta: I'd call it your sexbot, but as you're currently demonstrating...

Vegeta: YOU DON'T HAVE ANY BALLS!

Old Android: 'Yes! He's desperate to find me...'

Old Android: 'I just have to wait him out.'

Vegeta: Ah man, sure do feel winded after blowing up your robosexual life partner!

Vegeta: Sure would suck if you jumped me and took my energy!

Vegeta: Oh no! Some dust in my eyes! This is the worst!

Vegeta: GET THE F*CK OUT HERE!

Krillin: Hey, Vegeta! We finally caught up and--

Krillin: OH GOD, NO!

Old Android: And now your energy is mine!

Vegeta: But that's exactly what I was planning on.

Vegeta: I knew you couldn't resist jumping out to suckle on my Super Saiyan teat!

Vegeta: And now you're mine, all mine, you old le--

Vegeta: ...Hey! Get back here, I wasn't done!

Vegeta: This tactical shit's getting really old!

Vegeta: Now you get out here, and fight me blindly like a man!

Vegeta: Or a... mandroid.

Old Android: 'Yes, you may be a Super Saiyan, Vegeta, but you're still just an arrogant little brat, aren't you?'

Vegeta: Olly olly oxen bitch!

Old Android: 'Well, while you continue to prattle on...'

Old Android: 'I shall make my escape an--'

Old Android: '...Oh, they followed me! No matter, I'll just head the other way an--'

Old Android: '...Okay, fine, I'll just maneuver back where I came fro--'

Old Android: 'WHY THE HELL IS HE EVEN HERE?!'

Old Android: 'Then again...'

Old Android: 'At my age, I could use more greens in my diet...'

Piccolo: 'Alright, what about "Regicide Blaster"?'

Nail: '"Doomsday Crush"!'

Piccolo: '"Anarchy Barrage"!'

Nail: '"Taco Tuesday"!'

Piccolo: '"Hellzone Grenade"!'

Nail: 'Ehhh...'

Piccolo: Screw you, I'm keeping that one.

Piccolo: (Muffled yelling)

Old Android: Hello there!

Nail: 'I'm gonna leave you two alone for now...'

Piccolo: NAAAAIL!

Old Android: Shhhhhh...!

Old Android: Oh, don't struggle...

Old Android: Just lie back and think of...

Old Android: *Namek*.

Piccolo: Ugh! 'Damn it! I have to contact Gohan!'

Piccolo: Gohan...! Do you hear me?!

Vegeta: 'Oh God, this feels amazing...! First thing I'm gonna do when I get home, is: * Step in front of a full length mirror * Strip down * Turn Super Saiyan and--'

Piccolo: Ugh-hugh GohanGohan*Gohan*!

Tien: ♫ 'Cat loves food yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah, cat loves--' ♫

Piccolo: Uhhh...

Tien: You heard... *nothing*.

Piccolo: Damn it! Gohan, this old man's got me from behind, you have to--

George Takei: Ohh my~...!

King Kai: *Seriously*, how do people keep getting on this line?!

Piccolo: (Muffled screaming)

Old Android: Mu-ha-ha-ha!

Old Android: Aa-ha-ha-ha-haa-ha--

Old Android: HA-UGH! D'ungh!

Old Android: NO! My head cylinder!

Piccolo: G-Gohan... how did you...?

Gohan: You two were hanging in the middle of the air! How could I NOT see you?

Piccolo: Don't you... sass me...

Vegeta: Well, look who finally installed a pair!

Old Android: Well, uh... this is a little awkward...

Old Android: Maybe... we could have a little dialogue and work this out--

Vegeta: Nno.

Old Android: Okay.

Old Android: Then, how about I fight the bald one first?

Tien: Anytime, old man.

Old Android: No! That one!

Krillin: Ehhh, I'ma opt out.

Piccolo: How about this one?

Old Android: Oh, please. As if you're in any condition to fight me.

Piccolo: Krillin, Senzu Bean.

Krillin: Senzu Bean?

Piccolo: Senzu Bean.

Krillin: Senzu Bean!

Piccolo: Call me the can opener, 'cause I'm about to bust open your metal ass!

Vegeta: Yeah, how about you just leave the one-liners to me? Besides, the old man is mine, Namekian.

Piccolo: I just figured you wouldn't wanna sully your "Super Saiyan hands" on such a weak opponent.

Vegeta: Y'know, the funny thing is, I know you're playing me... but you're right.

Vegeta: He's all yours.

Old Android: Ah yes, pit me against your little green man. I've already consumed enough energy from him to match him twice--

Old Android: D'OOAUGH-AACK!

Vegeta: Pfft, hah!

Yajirobe: There's a long list of bad ideas, and this one is at the top. You know that, right?

Bulma: I absolutely refuse to sit around and not be part of the action anymore!

Bulma: Do you know I never even saw Freeza?! Not once?!

Yajirobe: I'm pretty sure no one ever complained about not meeting Hitler!

Yajirobe: I mean, some people do, but they're weird...

Bulma: This isn't up for debate!

Yajirobe: You do know your kid is in the plane, right?!

Bulma: Oh, he doesn't know what's going on.

Yajirobe: Yeah, I don't think that's the point!

Yajirobe: Also, he keeps trying to feed off me.

Bulma: Don't worry, he'll give it up when he realizes it's a dry well.

Yajirobe: Yeah, 'bout that... have you ever seen what an all-Senzu-Bean diet does to a man?

Bulma: What?!

Yajirobe: Korin likes it.

Old Android: Okay, first... WHAT?!

Old Android: Second... THE F*CK?!

Piccolo: You know, I did spend 3 years training with Goku.

Old Android: Oh, so what? Are you a Super Saiyan now, too?!

Piccolo: Well... more of a "Super Namekian", I guess.

Old Android: Wait, I thought you were a demon.

Piccolo: Nope; slug-man.

Old Android: Wow... that's... significantly more mundane.

Piccolo: Ugh, I know! By the way, what's that brain case made out of?

Old Android: Oh, well, it's a polycarbonate thermoplastic laminated--

Old Android: DM'AAAARGH!

Vegeta: ...Anyone else feel like we over trained for this?

Krillin: Tell me about it--

Vegeta: No! Shut up!

Gohan: MR. PICCOLOOOOoo--!

Gohan: Oh, nevermind...

Piccolo: You know, I never understood why you'd even bother installing pain receptors.

Piccolo: Kinda comes off as an intentional design flaw if you ask me.

Old Android: Don't you criticize my methods like you understand the neural system!

Old Android: Pain is imperative to recognize when you are in peril, to give the human mind CON--

Old Android: TEEEEXXXXXT!!

Piccolo: So, contextually speaking...

Piccolo: How f*cked are you?

Old Android: You lime-colored son of a BITCH!

Old Android: It's going to take me at least... TWO HOURS to program a new hand!

Old Android: No, wait... I'm right handed!

Old Android: THREE HOURS!!

Old Android: You miserable reprobates! What have I ever done to you?!

Piccolo: Pretty sure you vaporized half a city.

Old Android: I meant recently!

Piccolo: That was an hour ago.

Old Android: Semantics!

Trunks: I'm sorry I'm late. The Time Machine's a little imprecise in terms of hours and--

Trunks: What the *hell* is that thing?!

Piccolo: Trunks?! What are you doing here?!

Vegeta: Hah! That's a girl's name!

Krillin: Wait, isn't that the name of your kid?

Vegeta: What? Are you trying to imply that this wannabe Super Saiyan from the future is my soooooooooo....

Trunks: Well, guess that cat's outta' the bag. But seriously, what is that?!

Piccolo: That's the Android.

Trunks: No it's not.

Piccolo: Yes it is!

Trunks: No! It's not!

Old Android: Yes, I am!

Trunks: You stay out of this!

Tien: Wait, so you're saying that *that's* not the Android that kills us?

Trunks: No, I don't even--

Krillin: But you *said* two Androids, right?

Tien: And we've been fighting two.

Trunks: Yes I said two, but that's not one of them!

Vegeta: Why didn't you tell us what they look like, then?!

Trunks: I only ever met the two!

Vegeta: Well look at that, SO DID WE!

Bulma: Hey guys!

Vegeta: And now the woman's here!

Gohan: Bulma, *no*!

Trunks: DID SHE BRING *ME*?!

Old Android: 'And there's my door!' >:D

Piccolo: '"Wind Scar"!'

Nail: '"Spirit Gun"!'

Piccolo: '"Bankai"!'

Nail: '"Rasengan"!'

Piccolo: '"Gum Gum Pistol".'

Nail: '...That sounds dirty.'